Announcing the First Weekly, Biweekly, Monthly, Bimonthly, or Yearly Birth Story Blog Carnival!

Ok, so here's the thing:

Every single time I tell a labor and delivery story, I get comments and emails with tiny little teasing snippets of somebody's birth story. Have I mentioned that I LOVE BIRTH STORIES? I love them for soooo many reasons. They remind me that there is this whole, huge back story to every single one of my patients. They remind me that, unfortunately, sometimes L&D nurses can be giant cunts -- and they help me avoid that fate. They help me be a better nurse. They remind me why I chose this particular specialty -- because, really, how awesome is it to be a part of somebody's original birthday?

K, anyway...I'm starting a birth story blog carnival. Right here and now. It might turn out to be weekly, biweekly, monthly, bimonthly, trimonthly, yearly, who the heck knows? But I want to post your birth stories here on my blog.

My birth story is very special, you say, why should I give it to you?

Well. Good question.

1) First, I will only post it here -- it still belongs to you. I will link to you -- for sure in the carnival posting, but, if I really like you and you don't have a Japanese language blog about puppy torture, I'll put you in my blogroll, too.

2) You will get a new audience here for your awesome birth story. OK, I know that I attract mainly porn googlers because I say vagina so much, but who knows how much you might sentimentally effect some random porn googler with your cool birth story?

3) You will be participating in building a community -- a community of mothers who tell it like it is. (I don't really know what I mean by that.)

Ok. So here are the rules, baby.

Who can participate?

Anybody with a birth story to tell. Mothers, fathers, pissed off relatives, nurses, midwives, docs.

Please email your story to me at padandpanty@gmail.com.

I reserve the right to edit for punctuation, grammar, and shit like that -- I used to be a high school English teacher, ok? Give me a break.

Please include me in your blog roll before you submit. This is part of my evil plan to become an A-lister.

Or, what would be extra super cool...is if you would put this button on your site somewhere:





Here's the code:





Ok, I have no effing idea how to give you this code in a post. I'm not really very smart. When you email me the birth story, hows about I send you back the code for the button? But you don't have to use the button, if you don't want. You can just put me on your blogroll. I'm not a super greedy monkey. But, I would really think it was awesome if you used my button -- my son who is in art school designed it.

May I just take a moment to add that I will be unbelievably humiliated if nobody participates?